Loving a person who is not happy with his/her life can be like trying to hug a cactus. Very prickly and it hurts.
Sometimes people who are in pain lash out at the ones who are closest (and safest) to them.
We can remember that we cannot control the people we love. We cannot make them be happy. We cannot force them to be kind to us.
We can love them even if we do not love their behavior. We can decide to not take their moods personally. We can be kind to them anyway.
We can respond in compassionate ways when others express their pain in ways that are less than loving – rather than react out of pain. In the end it is our own behavior that we truly have to deal with. When we act in loving ways, we do not have regrets.